1. |
Amateur Psychologist
04:27
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I know a little bit about psychology
I know little tiny bit, a really microscopic bit about psychology
But what I lack in expertise
I make up for very well with enthusiasm.
You only need to drop the hint
That you might be suffering and I’ll be there with so much advice you’d need three life times to take it all in at once.
I’ll help you out
I’ll help you out
I’ll help you, why?
Cause I’m an amateur psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psy--
I'll tell you the reasons why you think what you do
Why that train of thought is not unique
And all the reasons why you feel what you do
In your subconscious we’ll be taking a peak.
And I know so many findings, from so many studies
Each one of them is totally true
And I’ll give you illuminating advice such as:
"...Ohhh. You're not over him are you?"
I’ve obviously got a gift
Of hypersensitivity to the needs of my friends
It depends do you meditate? I think it’s great, we should do a session today just you and I
Why?
Cause I’m an amateur psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psy--
I’ll take you there
We’ll plumb the depths of your despair
Cause I know everything about how you tick
For these conversations I am well equipped
I can dissect your childhood
I’ll question your mood
Probe you about substances
Addiction to food
And I am honoured that you've confided in me
And I will oh so generously
Take your problems and I’ll make 'em mine
Tell you all about the flaws in your design
What you really meant when you said you’re okay
And for all my services you won’t have to pay
I’m a shoulder to cry on, I’m someone who’ll listen
But before you start I have got to get this in
I don’t have experience, degrees or scruples
But why are my friends all becoming my pupils?
Cause I’m their amateur psychologist
Amateur psychologist
Ama-- Ama-- Ama...
I know a little bit about psychology
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2. |
[some comedy]
03:23
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3. |
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I know better than you do about how you should do your job
I know better than you do about how you should do your job
We all know better than you do, about you, and how you, should do your job.
I know better than you do about how you should raise your kids
Make sure there's no boundaries, or gifts that are off limits
Then pack 'em full of sugar! And yell at them for getting excited
Yes I know better than you do about how you should raise your kids
I know better than you do about the foods that you should eat
Cavemen didn't eat dairy! So really why should we?
I've narrowed down our problems, and it was centuries of eating wheat!
Yes I know better than you do about the foods that you should eat
I know better than you do about how to afford a house
It's pretty simply really, you get the money for a house
Now if you can't get a job which would allow you to afford a house,
Then I can't really help you if you want to buy a house.
I know better than you do about how you should live your life
You should have a family, that has a husband and a wife
And I don’t need to know you to give you all of my advice
Because I'd know better than you do about how you should live your life
I know better than you do about how you should do your job
I know better than you do about how you should do your job
We all know better than you do, about you, and how you, should do your job.
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4. |
Important Shit
03:42
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Seat belts and condoms and swimming classes
Protective glasses.
They will seal me from crashes and spills, the risks of the thrills
And I will arrive safe and alive and on time for life.
Reading and writing and how to add up.
The things that you want to the things that you've got.
And most of all son though it won't seem of use
You must find the length of this hypotenuse.
But nobody teaches you any of the important shit.
How to lose someone then properly deal with it.
There's no standard tests on anything that's worth a damn
And I only get one attempt at this exam.
Love songs, books and romantic comedies
Greeting cards, chain emails, tweets.
That's where we find our life living syllabus
Generally leaving us lost
How to be okay with how small you are
Look after your car and make healthy dinners
How to let somebody into your heart
How to let that person out.
Nobody teaches you any of the important shit.
How not to love someone when they don't requite it
There's no standard tests on anything that's worth a damn
How to back down, when to stand your ground
How to know if you're wrong in the face of your hearts strings
Screaming at you "this is too good to lose" as it's blown away.
But then I would probably sleep through that class if there was one.
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5. |
Heart In A Box
02:50
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So there's my heart
I keep it in this box.
As you can see it has been scratched a few times before
But I won't be so careless with it any more
And it means I never cry
Though at times I seem cold
And if you weep onto my shoulder I'll have nothing to say
But if you just wait for a minute I'll be back right away
With this heart for you.
We'll keep yours brand new.
But don't you dare take it out without telling me first
I need to be fully prepared for that kind of thing
Or else I could be crippled by the slightest sting
I keep the box velvet lined
I hope that you don't mind
You seem like someone who could take care of this.
But I've trusted each girl since my very first kiss
See there's chunks missing from when I ripped it back
From lovers when it turned out they just wanted to attack
Though you are the first to come to stay
Without me leading the way
So look after me and I will look after you
And we'll put photos in the box of the memories that pass
And I assure you, this high quality box will last
With your heart inside
Safe and dry
Keep your heart inside
Holding on to mine.
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6. |
Be Merry
05:16
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So let's forget about our troubles
Let's just forget about our bills
We'll have a beautiful time
On beautiful wine
There's plenty more where this one came from
It doesn't matter if it spills.
We'll take some photos and make some memories
In the shade of these glorious jacaranda trees
And I cannot seem to remember what distracted me
From the beauty and the joy and the sweet sweet smiles
Of your lovely company
And this moment's just a moment I know
But it's not a moment to waste
So let's forget about our troubles
Let's just forget about our bills
We'll have a beautiful time
On beautiful wine
And we'll be crazy unproductive
No more work to be done today
No assignments, no messages
Just fooling around
And no, no, no more essays
And this moment's just a moment, just a moment I know
But it's not a moment to waste
~~~
And I cannot for the life of me know
How foolish chores distracted me so
Far from the way
That I have so enjoyed today.
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7. |
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Home is where I want to be
Pick me up and turn me around
I feel numb, born with a weak heart
Guess I must be having fun
The less we say about it the better
Make it up as we go along
Feet on the ground, my head in the sky
It's okay, I know nothing's wrong, nothing
I got plenty of time
You got light in your eyes
And you're standing here beside me
I love the passing of time
Never for money, always for love
Cover up and say goodnight, say goodnight
Home, is where I want to be
But I guess that I'm already there
I come home, she lifted up her wings
I guess that this must be the place
I can't tell one from the other
I find you, or you find me?
There was a time before we were born
If someone asks, this is where I'll be, where I'll be
We drift in and out
Sing into my mouth
Out of all those kinds of people
You got a face with a view
I'm just an animal looking for a home
Can we share the same space for a minute or two?
And you love me till my heart stops
Love me till I'm dead
Eyes that light up
Eyes look through you
Cover up the blank spots
Hit me on the head
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