I know a little bit about psychology
I know little tiny bit, a really microscopic bit about psychology

But what I lack in expertise
I make up for very well with enthusiasm.

You only need to drop the hint
That you might be suffering and I’ll be there with so much advice you’d need three life times to take it all in at once.
I’ll help you out
I’ll help you out
I’ll help you, why?

Cause I’m an amateur psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psy--

I'll tell you the reasons why you think what you do
Why that train of thought is not unique
And all the reasons why you feel what you do
In your subconscious we’ll be taking a peak.
And I know so many findings, from so many studies
Each one of them is totally true
And I’ll give you illuminating advice such as:

"...Ohhh. You're not over him are you?"

I’ve obviously got a gift
Of hypersensitivity to the needs of my friends
It depends do you meditate? I think it’s great, we should do a session today just you and I

Why?

Cause I’m an amateur psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psychologist
Amatuer psy--

I’ll take you there
We’ll plumb the depths of your despair
Cause I know everything about how you tick
For these conversations I am well equipped
I can dissect your childhood
I’ll question your mood
Probe you about substances
Addiction to food
And I am honoured that you've confided in me
And I will oh so generously

Take your problems and I’ll make 'em mine
Tell you all about the flaws in your design
What you really meant when you said you’re okay
And for all my services you won’t have to pay
I’m a shoulder to cry on, I’m someone who’ll listen
But before you start I have got to get this in
I don’t have experience, degrees or scruples
But why are my friends all becoming my pupils?

Cause I’m their amateur psychologist
Amateur psychologist
Ama-- Ama-- Ama...

I know a little bit about psychology